You’re halfway through an important report, but you can’t shake the thought that you have made a huge mistake. You re-read your last paragraph, then the one before, just to be sure. Minutes pass, then hours but that thought still lingers, and your focus starts slipping.
If these types of thoughts are persistent, feel out of your control and are unwanted, they might be intrusive thoughts. Intrusive thoughts may leave you questioning your competence and chip away at your confidence. These types of thoughts may feel overwhelming but the good news is there are ways to manage them.
What are intrusive thoughts?
Everyone experiences the occasional, unwanted thought. An intrusive image or thought that seems to come out of nowhere. These might include sudden worries about something terrible happening, distressing thoughts of harming someone, or fears of doing something embarrassing. For most, these thoughts are easy to dismiss. But sometimes, they can become repetitive, upsetting, and start to interfere with daily life or work.
Although common, intrusive thoughts can cause distress for some people. People often experience their thoughts as truths or facts. However, it’s important to remember that your mind creates many thoughts that may not reflect your true desires or intentions. When intrusive thoughts are persistent, they may affect concentration, confidence, and overall wellbeing. The first step in managing their impact is learning how to recognise them.
How to tell when a thought is intrusive
- Persist despite evidence:
Intrusive thoughts often continue to occur despite evidence that contradicts the thought. For example, suddenly worrying that you will do something stupid in a meeting, even though you generally appear confident and professional.
- Experienced as upsetting or disturbing:
The thought may not align with your values. For example, suddenly being afraid that you are going to hurt somebody, even though you are not a violent person.
- Difficult to control:
They could be constantly and repetitively looping in your mind. For example, relaying a conversation over and over, worrying you said something wrong.
- Strong urge to suppress:
Due to the upsetting nature of many intrusive thoughts, there is a strong desire to avoid, push-away or distract from the thought.
Common triggers for intrusive thoughts
- Stress
Intrusive thoughts intensify during periods of high stress, especially when there are unresolved emotions beneath the surface. The brain becomes more sensitive to potential threats (real or imagined). This can increase their frequency and intensity.
- Hormonal changes
Shifts in hormone levels during pregnancy, postpartum, or menopause can leave the brain more vulnerable to intrusive thoughts. For example, it is common for new mothers to experience distressing intrusive thoughts shortly after giving birth, often related to fears of harm or loss.
- Loneliness
Spending a lot of time alone can lead to overthinking and second-guessing your social interactions. This can reduce confidence and fuel intrusive worries like thinking you said something wrong.
- Lack of sleep
Fatigue reduces the brain’s ability to regulate thoughts effectively. When you are sleep-deprived, you are less able to filter out unhelpful or irrelevant thoughts, which can make intrusive thoughts feel more intense and difficult to dismiss.
Common ways intrusive thoughts show up at work
- Feeling like an imposter, even when you are performing well
- Over-checking your work or repeatedly seeking reassurance from colleagues
- Obsessing over past mistakes, even small ones
- Replaying conversations and worrying you said the wrong thing
- Persistent fear of embarrassing yourself or being judged
What NOT to do
- Supress or avoid the thought
Actively trying not to think about something increases your brains focus on it. For example, if I told you not to think about a purple tiger, you cannot. In fact, the more you try not to think about it, the more it sticks around
- Over-analyse or rationalise the thought
These behaviours fuel the perceived importance of the thought. Your brain sees the fact that you are expending energy as a sign that the thought is meaningful or dangerous. Moreover, overthinking usually leads to more questions than answers, trapping you in a mental loop.
- Seek constant reassurance
Reassurance might give you quick relief, but it teaches you that you cannot trust your own judgement. This leaves you dependent on other people to make you feel okay.
What to do instead
- Mindfulness meditation
Practising mindfulness helps you stay in the present moment by gently focusing your attention on your breath, body, or surroundings. This increased awareness allows you to notice your thoughts, even intrusive ones, without reacting to or judging them. Over time, this may help to reduce the emotional impact they have and help you to respond more calmly.
- Cognitive defusion
Imagining your thoughts as separate from you creates distance and reduces their emotional weight. Picture them as trains passing through a station. For example, you might imagine your thoughts as images or text on the side of the trains. You only “board” the trains that have helpful thoughts labelled on them. This mental detachment may make intrusive thoughts easier to release.
Remember – thoughts are not facts
People often experience their thoughts as facts. It may be helpful to remind yourself that thoughts are simply mental events created by our mind. It’s not the thought itself that is the problem it’s how much we “buy into” or become hooked by the thought. Reminding yourself that thoughts are not facts, may help you to gain some distance from them.
- Journalling
Journalling encourages acceptance of intrusive thoughts. Set a timer for a few minutes and write down thoughts that pop into your head without filtering. Seeing them on paper may help to lessen their intensity.
- Values-aligned living
Engaging in positive, immersive activities that are aligned with your personal values may help to break the intrusive thought cycle. Try cooking, walking, or chatting with a friend, anything that holds your full attention and reminds you that your thoughts do not control you.
- Therapy
If intrusive thoughts interfere with daily life, therapy may help. Evidence-based approaches like Acceptance and Commitment Therapy may help to reduce their impact and improve wellbeing.
There is hope…
Intrusive thoughts can feel isolating, overwhelming, and frightening. It’s important to remember that intrusive thoughts do not define who you are. If you are struggling to cope and need support developing strategies that work for you, reach out today for a free 15-minute consultation to explore how Uplift Psychology can help.
References
https://toolkit.lifeline.org.au/articles/techniques/managing-intrusive-thoughts
https://www.therlively.com/resources/obsessions
https://www.calm.com/blog/how-to-stop-intrusive-thoughts
Disclaimer – this blog is for education and information purposes only. It does not constitute individual advice. The information contained in this post may not be applicable or appropriate for everyone. If you need support, consider seeking individualised support.
